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WARNING: If you haven't read the warning on the index page, go back and read it. If you don't, and you don't like what you find here, don't come crying to me.

Title: Right

Author: Eleanor K.

Fandom: Firefly

Pairing: Mal/Jayne

Rating: NC-17

Posted: 20 Dec 2002

Spoilers: Small ones for Objects in Space and Our Mrs. Reynolds.

Email: emungere@gmail.com

Disclaimer: Joss is god. Fox can bite me.

..___..


"So that Saffron girl, you didn't ever do her, huh?"

Mal looked up from his soup. Jayne was studying him from across the table, shoveling something into his mouth as he waited for an answer.

"No."

"'Cause it weren't right?" The last word was leaned on heavily, a hair away from mockery.

"Yes, Jayne. Because it wasn't right."

"And I guess you don't go to hookers neither, 'cause that ain't right."

"My patience is wearing thin, Jayne."

"I got a point here."

"Then get to it. Or better yet, get back to work."

"I'm eating. So no hookers, and you barely leave the ship except for business, so no one night stands. And you ain't sleeping with no one on the crew, are you?"

"Why the sudden interest in my sex life?"

"I'm getting there. So no one on the crew?"

Mal sighed. "No."

It was tempting to just tell Jayne to shut the hell up about what was in no way his business, but he had to admit he was a little curious where this was going. Not to mention that the sight of Jayne looking so intent and serious about this was more than a little amusing.

"Well, have you thought about it?"

"Can't say as I have."

Jayne nodded. "Inara don't service crew. And Zoe'd kill you."

"Zoe would laugh. She'd only kill me if I tried for Wash."

"Yeah. Sounds about right. Kaylee?"

Mal met Jayne's eyes and gave him what he hoped was a sufficiently scary look.

"Yeah, okay," Jayne said. "Not Kaylee. Not River neither, I'm guessing."

"She's seventeen!"

"Okay, you don't need to shout. And the preacher says he doesn't ever..." Jayne trailed off for a moment, an unsettled look on his face. "I mean, not *ever*. So I figure that leaves the doc."

Only with Jayne could he ever end up having a conversation like this.

"This is getting less amusing all the time. You looking to set me up with someone, is that the idea?"

"That's it."

"Uh-huh. Mind if I ask why?"

"Well, I figure the reason you're so uptight is 'cause you're not getting any, so maybe if you were you'd loosen up and not go around blaming me for things that ain't my fault."

"This again? It was your hardware, Jayne. It didn't just walk out of the locker by itself."

"Four other people on this ship got that combo. I'm just saying, it wasn't me."

"Enough, Jayne. Getting me sex is not going to make me stop riding your ass."

There was a second of silence while they both considered that statement.

"Oh, hell. You know what I mean."

Jayne whooped with laughter. "Maybe I should've been offering my ass instead of trying to protect it!"

"You see me not laughing over here?"

"'S'what I'm telling you! Uptight!" Jayne's laughter died down to snorts and chuckles. "You gotta relax more, start getting your ashes hauled on a regular basis. Do you a world of good."

Mal sighed and stood up. "Okay, I'm done with this conversation."

Jayne caught up with him in the hall.

"So seriously, not the doc?"

"Absolutely not."

"Well... that does only leave me."

Mal pictured the huge, shit-eating grin Jayne had to be wearing and didn't even bother to look at him.

"Don't talk to me any more, Jayne."

***

"Mal? May I speak to you for a moment?"

Mal turned. Inara stood behind him, wearing that expression she had that hovered on the edge of being a smile without ever tipping over.

"Sure. Problem?"

Her not-smile warmed. "You always expect it to be a problem."

"Experience."

"I don't know whether this classifies or not. Jayne stopped by to see me earlier."

"If he's bothering you--"

"Oh, no. Nothing like that."

"'Cause he knows damn well--"

"Really, Mal, it's all right. He wasn't... offensive."

"Well, I guess that's one for the record books then. What'd he do?"

Inara frowned. "I think... I think he was trying to ask my advice."

"Jayne? On what?"

"Seduction...?" Inara sounded unsure, and Mal couldn't blame her.

"We are talking about Jayne here, right? Walking wall of muscle, none of it so thick as what's between his ears? I'd think his idea of seduction would be a head start."

"I know, but... he really seemed sincere. Nervous, but sincere."

"Nervous and sincere generally go hand in hand for him. So... seduction?"

Inara nodded, still looking puzzled, and a little creeped out if Mal was any judge. It was a bit creepifying when he thought about it.

"Of who?"

She started to say something and stopped. "He was... vague."

"Well, what'd he actually say?"

"He *said*, 'How would you get a man to sleep with you that didn't want to sleep with you?' I can only hope he was talking about seduction and not anything involving drugs."

"I'm hoping that, too," Mal muttered. "That's all he said?"

"That was the only complete sentence, yes."

"And what'd you tell him?"

"I didn't get a chance to tell him anything. Kaylee came in, and he took off."

"Okay." Mal sighed. This just put the cap on a very long day. "Okay, I'll deal with it. Whatever it is."

Remembering their conversation from earlier in the day he had a bad feeling he already knew what it was. But... Jayne? Seduction? Surely not. It could wait till morning anyway.

He reached his bunk without meeting anyone and climbed down with a sense of relief.

As he reached up to close the door hands grabbed his wrists and pinned them above his head. In a fraction of a second there was the feel of cold metal, the click of a lock, and when he tried to jerk away he found he was cuffed to the ladder.

The lights were off, and the dim light from the open door fell on him like a spotlight without illuminating the rest of the room.

"Jayne? Right now I'm hoping that's you, so if you let me out of these in the next thirty seconds I'll forgive and forget."

"Five minutes," said a voice in the dark.

It was Jayne's voice at least, but Mal wasn't reassured. The handcuffs didn't exactly inspire trust.

"Twenty seconds. And counting."

"No, look, just give me five minutes. If you don't like it, I'll stop."

"You'll stop right now." He had to stop himself adding 'If you know what's good for you.' Threatening Jayne was a bad idea. You stated what the future would be, and Jayne tended to fall in line with it. Threats only made him swagger and push even harder.

Jayne stepped out of the dark. "Come on," he said. "It'll be good. You'll like it." He hooked two fingers inside Mal's waistband and moved closer until Mal could feel his hardness pressed against his hip.

"There's a word for what you're talking about, Jayne. Starts with an 'R' in case you're thinking slow today."

Jayne's eyes widened. He jerked his hand away and took a long step back. "No! I didn't mean... Jesus, Mal. I ain't never done that. To nobody. What do you think I am?"

"Right now I think you're the man who has me cuffed to a ladder, talking about doing stuff I don't want to do." Not going to kick him in the balls, he told himself. Not going to kick him in the balls. It won't help. Maybe later.

"Well, it's your fault! You won't gorram well listen!"

Mal laughed shortly. "Listen to what? You and me having sex? I thought you were joking! Hell, a joke's all it ever could be, and a poor one at that."

Jayne crossed his arms and glared. "What, I ain't good enough for you? You said you didn't want the doc, so what's the problem?"

"A few hours ago this was a joke to you, too. Something change and I didn't notice? I suddenly become irresistible or something?"

Jayne snorted. "Nothing like that, trust me."

"Then what?" Not going to kick him in the balls. It won't get the cuffs off me. Jayne's crotch was right there, though, perfectly positioned for boot deployment.

"I guess... I just got to thinking." Jayne stuck his hands in his pockets and backed off a few steps, vanishing into the dark.

"Turn the damn lights on. Thinking about what?" he added when Jayne obeyed.

"Stuff. You know."

Mal watched Jayne's profile as he rubbed one leaf of the plant on the desk between thumb and forefinger.

"I don't know. What stuff would that be?"

"Stuff." Jayne shrugged one shoulder, an uncomfortable gesture that turned his body away still more. "I never thought about you like that before today, but once I did it kinda... stuck."

"And you didn't think maybe *asking* should come before handcuffs?"

"Well, I knew you'd say no, so what would be the point? I thought I could just... convince you."

Mal sighed. "Take the cuffs off, Jayne."

There was a tense second when he thought Jayne might just point blank refuse, but he did eventually lumber over and unlock them. Mal rubbed his wrists automatically.

Jayne moved slowly to grab the ladder above Mal's head and leaned forward. "Just give me a chance," he said. "Don't tell me you don't want to get your rocks off with *somebody*, 'cause I won't believe you."

Mal had an answer for that, but Jayne laid a finger over his mouth, roughened skin catching on his lip. Words deserted him for a second, and then Jayne was talking again.

"And don't tell me it ain't right neither." Jayne grinned suddenly. "However you twist it around in that head of yours, there's no way you can think you're taking advantage of *me*."

Mal was surprised into laughter. "No, I don't suppose I can." He looked up into Jayne's eyes and was shocked to find himself considering it. It had been a damn long time.

He shook it off. It was Jayne, for god's sake.

Aware that he was getting into deeper territory than either of them were used to, he took a second or two to consider his next words.

"Look, it shouldn't be... Just wanting to get off shouldn't be the only reason." He forced himself to keep his gaze steady, but it was tough going. It was embarrassing enough that he thought this stuff. He sure as hell didn't want to be saying it out loud. "Ought to be about more than that." He was trying to think how to go on when Jayne interrupted him.

"Don't tell me you been in love with everyone you ever screwed around with."

"Don't know about love. I liked all of them."

"Oh." There was silence for a second. "And you don't like me."

It would be so easy if he could just say no, I don't, and let it go at that. Well, he could. It wouldn't be true, but that wasn't so much of a problem. The problem was the way Jayne was looking at him, like he wanted to be told he was wrong, like it would actually matter to him.

"I didn't say that, Jayne."

"Well, go ahead and say it then. What is this, you trying not to hurt my feelings?"

"Does that strike you as at all likely?"

"It'd be a first," Jayne admitted.

"I don't not like you."

Jayne chuckled.

"What?"

"If that's the best you can do in the way of compliments it's no wonder you're not getting any."

"Didn't know you were looking for compliments."

"I ain't. Not looking for lies neither."

Mal rubbed at his eyes. This was starting to get wearing. "I'm not lying. I don't mostly, if I can help it."

He did like Jayne. There were days when he wondered why, but he did. There was always a certain relief to being with him. Jayne never made things more complicated than they had to be, and making things complicated seemed to be a specialty for just about everyone else on his boat.

"Let me kiss you."

Mal jerked his head up. "What?"

"You heard what I said. It's no big deal. If you hate it, I'll leave."

"You'll leave when I tell you to leave."

"Yeah. I will." Jayne gave him a crooked smile. "You're the boss here. That ain't gonna change. Just let me do this."

Mal hesitated. He'd seen Jayne get shot down by Kaylee and Zoe, at the dinner table and a shooting range respectively. Jayne had grumbled, but he'd gotten on with the eating and the shooting. It wasn't like him to get so hung up on this. It was... flattering, actually. In a weird kind of way.

"And if I say yes?"

Jayne smirked at him. "Been that long?"

"You're a laugh a minute. I mean will you drop all this?"

"If you don't like it, sure."

Damn, but Jayne sounded confident.

"Fine. Do it."

"Do what?"

"What, you want me to say it?"

"Yeah, reckon I do." Jayne tilted his head a little, smiling. "Reckon I'd like to hear you say that."

It was a brief struggle. Mal's sense of humor, warped at the best of times, got the better of him almost immediately.

He fluttered his eyelashes and then looked up at Jayne through them, thinking that this would be the first time he'd kissed someone he *could* looked up at through his lashes. "Oh, please, Jayne," he said in the breathiest voice he could manage without laughing, "Won't you kiss me now?"

He waited, trying to keep a straight face and watching Jayne try to do the same.

"Asshole."

"Yeah," Mal said. "*That's* the newsflash of the millennium."

Jayne kissed him.

It wasn't anything like what Mal had expected. Jayne's hands stayed on the ladder, not even touching him, and his mouth was gentle. So gentle that Mal found himself pressing forward, making it deeper, until their mouths were open to each other. Deep, wet, hard joining of lips and tongues, and Mal put a hand behind Jayne's neck to pull him closer. He wanted that hard body against his and while the kiss lasted he wasn't thinking about anything else.

When it broke and he was trapped between the ladder and Jayne without an inch to spare in any direction, things were a little different. He wanted to back away but couldn't, and in any case his hands seemed unwilling to let go. Jayne's thigh was pressed between his legs.

"You liked it." Jayne shifted, rubbing his thigh against Mal's growing hard-on. "Don't try and tell me you didn't."

Mal was staring at Jayne's chest, trying to think what to do-- or just trying to think. He glanced up when Jayne spoke, realized that he was looking up at him through his lashes and that that absolutely would not do, and tilted his head up to look at him full on.

"I won't," he said finally.

He had liked it, and it was getting hard to remember why this was such a bad idea, particularly since most of his arguments had centered on the fact that this was *Jayne*, and, well, sex and Jayne just didn't go together, or at least not with him in the middle. All of a sudden that argument wasn't working any more.

"You still gonna tell me to leave?"

"Yes."

Jayne looked at him for a long moment and then cupped his face in one large hand. He leaned forward and planted wet kisses on Mal's mouth, his jaw, down his neck. He started to suck, pausing long enough to rumble, "Fine. You just let me know when."

Mal ran his hands under Jayne's shirt, up over a stomach and chest hard with muscle, and up further until Jayne lifted his arms and let him pull the shirt off and toss it away.

"I'll do that," he said.

He lowered his head and leaned forward, the fine hair on Jayne's chest tickling his cheek. He breathed in, closing his eyes for a second. He had missed this, the smell and feel and warmth of another body. Jayne smelled like soap, and like the spicy-sweet cigars he smoked, and like gunpowder. Mal's lips found a nipple and began to suck.

He heard Jayne hiss above him, and then his suspenders were pulled off his shoulders and there were fingers opening his pants and jerking them down around his thighs. A warm hand closed around his cock, and he bit down gently, worrying the nipple between his teeth. Jayne gasped his name and started pumping him.

Mal tried to get Jayne's pants undone, but found his hands pushed away.

"Later," Jayne told him roughly.

He gave up, holding on tight to Jayne's shoulders and breathing hard against his skin, muffling his cry as he came too quickly, shaking with it.

Jayne's hands soothed him afterwards, running over his back and sides and down to cup his ass and hold him close. Blunt fingers slid down between the cheeks, and he pressed back against them.

Part of him couldn't help thinking it was no wonder Jayne had told him 'later' if this was what he had in mind, but mostly he was wondering what in the 'verse they could use for lube. Meanwhile one finger was rubbing back and forth across his opening and making it hard to think at all.

He did his best to let Jayne know that they were in trouble on the lube front. He thought the words came out a bit garbled, but Jayne seemed to understand well enough.

"You gonna be pissed off if I tell you I brought some with me?"

Mal considered that. Hell of an assumption to make. He should be pissed off. "Probably," he said. "Later."

"But not right now?"

"Not unless you make me wait."

Oh, shit, did he just say that? Judging from Jayne's rumble of laughter, yes. Well, screw it. He did want it, and not up against the damn ladder either. There would be bruises tomorrow where the rungs were digging into his back and thighs.

He pushed Jayne away and did away with boots and pants, unbuttoned his shirt and let it join the rest on the floor. He walked to the bed and turned, waiting for Jayne to follow, but Jayne only looked at him. Stared, actually.

Mal crossed his arms. "What?"

Jayne opened his mouth and shut it again. "You, ah..."

"I, ah, what?"

"You look good," Jayne said in a hushed voice. "Real good."

Mal smiled. "Always nice to be appreciated." He sat on the bed and leaned back on his elbows. "So are you just going to stand there or what?"

It took Jayne less than thirty seconds to get his clothes off and then he was pushing Mal's legs apart and brushing lips and beard over his cock.

Mal closed his eyes and let his head tip back as he felt himself grow hard again. Jayne climbed up over him, sucking at his throat until Mal pushed him away and turned over. He waited on his hands and knees, head hanging down, wondering just how he got here so damn fast. Then Jayne's slick fingers were pushing into him, and it didn't matter any more.

"Damn, you're tight," Jayne muttered. "Done this before?"

"Not for a good long time." He would have liked to tell Jayne to take it slow, but he wasn't a wuss, dammit. He could take it. And even if he couldn't, he wasn't about to admit that to Jayne.

He didn't have to worry. By the time there were three fingers inside him, he was more than ready. His hair was damp with sweat, hanging in his eyes, and his hands were clenched on the sheets.

"Jayne."

"Yeah, Mal?"

"Enough already," he growled.

The fingers left him. "Whatever you say, Captain."

Hands held his hips, and Jayne entered him in one hard push that left him gasping.

"Good?"

"Yeah... oh, yeah that's good." He was faintly disturbed when his voice came out sounding every bit as breathy and desperate as when he'd asked Jayne to kiss him.

Jayne pulled back and thrust in harder, and Mal gasped as he hit that spot inside him dead on, sending a spike of pleasure through his body. His cock was hard again, and Jayne reached for it unerringly, sliding a slicked hand up and down and then moving to pinch his nipple sharply as he drove in again.

Mal pushed back to meet every thrust, red pleasure swimming behind his eyes as he shut them tight and lived in sensation. Jayne's hand moved between his cock and his chest, rolling one nipple in his fingers and dragging his hand down over Mal's stomach, nails scratching gently at tender skin.

It seemed almost like a dream, and yet too real to be disbelieved. This was Jayne fucking him, beard scratching against his back, making it so good, and if he'd ever thought about his mercenary like this he would have imagined something more along the lines of wham, bam, thank you, sir. A breathless laugh escaped him, turning into a low moan as Jayne's hand closed over his cock again.

It was too much to keep track of. Scents of sweat and sex filled the air. His skin was hot and sensitized, and his body thrummed with his racing heartbeat. His mind shut down as their bodies moved together, quickening, the pace building until Jayne drove even deeper with a choked cry, taking Mal with him as he came.

Mal collapsed onto the bed, and Jayne pulled out and flopped down next to him. Without thinking, Mal rolled over and pressed himself close, smiling with eyes still closed as Jayne's arms came around him.

After a few minutes of heavy breathing Jayne asked, "You gonna kick me out now?"

Not a chance in hell. It felt too good. He was all but clinging to the body against his, and he couldn't make himself give that up just yet.

"I said I'd let you know, didn't I?"

Jayne grunted, seemingly content with that, and settled down.

It was too insane, the both of them here together like this. But what in his life wasn't insane? He made himself let it go, stop worrying at it. It was done, and if there were to be dire consequences they could wait till morning.

"I'll make you a bet," Jayne said suddenly.

"What?" Mal asked, feeling wary.

"Bet if we keep this up for a week at least half the crew tells you to your face you're in a better mood than usual."

"Three and a half people?"

"Huh?"

"Seven people on the crew if you don't count the two of us. Half of seven is three and a half, so if you're saying three and half people are gonna comment on my mood, that's a bet I'm definitely taking."

"Smartass."

"My mamma always said learning fractions would come in handy some day."

"Bet she called you a smartass, too."

"On occasion."

"Three of them, then. You can't count the doc's sister. Nothing she says makes any sense anyway."

"How much are we talking here?"

"Fifty credits," Jayne said promptly.

"You're on."

"And you can't act grouchy on purpose. You got to play it straight."

Mal was silent for a moment. "Did I just agree to have sex with you for another week?"

"You sure did."

It was Jayne's shit-eating-grin voice, and Mal didn't bother to open his eyes and confirm the expression that went with it.

"I'm going to sleep."

Any second now, by the way he was feeling. Moving to get under the covers seemed like too much trouble. He stretched out and turned onto his side.

A minute or so later he felt Jayne get up, heard the rustle of fabric and muttered curses as Jayne hunted for his boots. He expected the sound of the door opening shortly after that and hoped Jayne would get the lights on his way out, but there was only silence.

He could feel Jayne's presence by the side of the bed, and then the mattress dipped as Jayne sat and pulled a blanket over him. He tried not to smile.

One finger ran lightly over his bottom lip. "Bad joke," he heard Jayne mutter. "Huh. Showed you."

The words weren't nearly as smug as Mal would have expected, and Jayne lingered a moment longer, brushing damp hair from Mal's forehead and tugging the blanket more securely around him.

The lights went off, and Mal was asleep before he heard the door close.

-------
..end..

continue to Fifty Credits.

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